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The Body in the Bag
PD. Charles O'Hegarty.
notes: A morbid little English ditty that gives us an opportunity to pull up
some of our cat jokes between songs.
The Body in the Bag

D              G          D
Our old cat died last night
The wife said: bury it out of sight
  D                                          G            D
We don’t have a yard ‘cause we’re livin’ in a flat
So what was I to do with the body of the cat
       D                      G      D
Then a big brown paper bag I spied
I stuffed our dear old cat inside
    D                         G              D
And off I went with the body in the bag
   G              D       A   D
The body in the bag ta-ra-ra

I went into the pub to have a whiskey, neat
I laid my little package underneath the seat
I hadn’t gotten scarcely half way up the town
When a voice comes up behind me sayin’: Your parcel, Mr. Brown
I had to stop and give the ruddy fool a half a crown
For bringin’ me the body in the bag, so...

I threw it in the river, but the hero from some play
Jumps right in to save it cryin’: hip hip hip, hooray
Says he to me: I don’t do this as a rule
And now I find I’m rather wet and also rather cool
I had to take me trousers off and give ‘em to the fool
For savin’ me the body in the bag, so...

I crept up some stairs as quiet as any mouse
I gently laid me burden on the doorstep of an ‘ouse
Just then the door flies open and a lady dressed in blue
Says: Pardon me monsieur, but do you parlevous?
I said: good gracious no, lady, I got better things to do
And I skedaddled with the body in the bag, and...

I headed for ‘ome, me feet began to drag
When I thought I felt a movement from inside the bag
I looked inside and I heard a plaintive meoooow
You needn’t bother, Tabby says, it’s all right now
And there were seven little bodies in the bag, so